Updated: Mar 15
Forgiving others can sometimes be hard, but forgiving ourselves can be even more complicated. For years I know I’ve repented over & over for some of the stupid things I’ve done in my youth—the inner work to forgive ourselves, for some, takes years of progression. Once we come to that long-awaited place where the deep-cleansing exhale breath can finally be savored, inevitably, when we least expect it, someone will slide in a comment about the past we’ve worked so hard to forgive ourselves of, leave in the rearview mirror of the past, and to "let go". Even years later, still, they can’t fight the urge to define us through the lens of being “damaged,” yet somehow functionally adequate. People simply create mental boxes they put us in and determine to keep us there indefinitely. Once we've processed all the junk of our past, the hurtful words of others just become nothing more than the roar of garbage trucks.
The chains of others’ opinions can’t be broken. Like the bucket of crabs, where one is almost making its’ way out, the others will reach up and pull it back down. This subject reminds me of young Yeshua in the book of Matthew (Chap.13). He was acquiring quite the reputation as a "Healer & Great Counselor." He spoke in powerful parables & embodied the wisdom, maturity, and fortitude necessary to go toe-to-toe in the synagogues with the Pharisees. And yet, when He returned to Nazareth, where he was born & grew up with his brothers & sisters, in Matt. 13:55-58, it tells us that the people of Nazareth were astonished. They said, “Is not THIS the carpenter’s son? Is his mother NOT Mary!? The passage goes on to tell us that they were “offended” by Him. As if to say, “who do you think you are?” Yeshua responded by saying, 57: “A prophet is not without honor, except in His own country, and in His own house.” 58: And He did NOT mighty works there, because of their unbelief. This goes to show that even a sinless “man” can’t get away from those who are bent on the unjustifiable prejudice of where He came from.
When I came to this walk in Torah, only then could I completely forgive, and embrace the release of this type of person. The small town, small life, small mind mentality is as old as Nazareth. Our Heavenly Father has given us an epic Kingdom mindset that becomes deeply ingrained into the fabric of what we are. The reminders of “where we came from” we may hear from others are as misguided as reminding the paper that The Father's Word is written on that it used to be just a tree that came from the forest where birds nested and squirrels lived. People can completely look pass what IS, and be stuck in what used to be.
I'm very aware of the uselessness of “boxing” others in and placing the brick of the past on the lid to keep it shut. During these 10 Days Of Awe, I’ve focused on not viewing others based on what I think I know about them because I’ve experienced first hand how hurtful that can be. To be more aware of that powerful .3 second delay between my thoughts & my words. We all have encountered brazenly blunt people. Blunt is rude, hurtful, careless, shows little to no mercy, and most often shameless. Instead of holding cruel people hostage to the apology that will never come, Yeshua has taught me to see them through the eyes of mercy. I now can pray for them to have an encounter with the Ruach ha Qodesh that will soften their hearts, lead them to repentance, and develop the emotional intelligence that has no desire to offend & hurt others.
Overall, people are growing more opinionated & callus these days. YAH's Word tells us that the love of many will wax cold. I’ve realized that I must equally grow, too, in the grace and mercy necessary to pray for their soul as the ones that deserve prayer the least seem to be the ones that need it the most. Rom. 5:8- But God commended his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. During these 10 Days Of Awe, I’ve realized that “emotional guardrails” are a gift of the Spirit and how crucial they concerning forgiveness. They keep us in a place where we're capable of sincerely PRAYING for those that won’t acknowledge the transformative power of following an authentic Yeshua and falling in love with the ways of YHVH, our Father. The stinging, salty comments speaks to the turmoil inside of them, even though the arrows are directed as us.
A PRAYER FOR HURTFUL PEOPLE: "Father YeHoVaH, As You are long in patience toward the careless hearts that take no thought of their words, or the Spirit driving them to cause so much internal chaos and be so hurtful, help me to turn the other cheek and love them anyway. Help me to be entirely compelled to pray for them and grasp the fact that just perhaps, they were placed in my path because I was the one, maybe the ONLY one, who would pray for their soul. Likewise, forgive me for the unspoken prejudicial thoughts of others, or writing them off as a lost cause. Help me to respect the fact that You are standing at the door knocking for them too. Forgive me for being angered, even hurt by their words and malice. Please help me carry them as a burden ONLY as a lost soul who desperately needs you, and to see them with the eyes of mercy. They are reckless & hurtful because they need You.
Thank You, Father, that even though others may “box me in,” You have given me the compassion to pray for them, and the spiritual wings to soar above the snare of unforgiveness." -Ahmein
If you've enjoyed this post, please leave a comment and let me know you were here. I'd love to hear your perspective as well. - Shalom